RUF spring retreat

So I just got back from Cape Cod last night and wow, it was an awesome trip. I came back last night feeling stretched and grown. It was certainly a lesson in patience between Jon and I. His body didn't really like being in the Cape and fought us the whole way. Its great though because every time one of us got really frustrated, the other would encourage and support. Jon and I have this interesting symbiotic friendship. Anyway, the weekend dealt a lot with character stuff. What motivates us to do things. It was really eye opening for me. I was thinking a lot about Jon and I and my motives behind helping out.

Now don't get me wrong, I feel blessed and humbled to be living with Jon. I find it awesome that this is my job. But I still feel like there is a little tiny bit of pride somewhere deep inside me that is screaming out for people to recognize the sacrifices that I make. Theres a part of me that wants people to see me and say "Wow, that guy is awesome for taking care of that quadriplegic kid." I hate this proud part of me. I don't want it. I want to do this because I feel like God is calling me to do it. I want to help Jon to glorify God, not myself.

In other news I had the amazing opportunity to ride with Joey to and from the Cape. We had great conversations both times and I'm really encouraged to get things stirred up in Middletown and on the Wesleyan Campus. I also came to the conclusion that I don't have to go to Wesleyan after Middlesex. I could go anywhere in the world for an education after community college. Thats a really encouraging thought for me. I'm giving some serious thought to checking out Uconn more specifically, but am also interesting in maybe going to school in the south. Theres a whole other culture in the south that I am completely unaware of. But who knows, maybe I will end up here at Wesleyan.

I had the great opportunity to pray for my friend Scott. God seemed to really be working in his life rearranging some things in his head. Scott may be a few years younger than me, but I have great respect for him and look up to his loyalty.

In the middle of this Christian Community it makes me want to go to a Christian school. I love being around Christians. But part of me was a little on edge. I think it might have to do with Valentine's Day coming up soon. I don't think I'm ready yet to get involved in a relationship right now, but its hard to not look around at all the attractive, intelligent, Christian girls at the retreat and think think "I'm not ready yet."

There are parts of my heart that are still looking for comfort in a person rather than in God. I want to love God with ALL my heart, with ALL my strength, with ALL my soul, and ALL my mind. I don't want to love God with whats left after I pour myself into a relationship. There is no remainder in the mathematics of love.
more to come on this soon, I want to ponder this a bit.

Random

I've decided not to cut my hair or shave my face for the next 2 years.





That is all

David Wagner

This is a prophecy I received in May, 8 months ago. It explains a lot about where I'm going and what I'm called to be.

David Wagner

5.20.06

Sound man is always the one who gets left out. You get the blame for everything and never get prayed for, just talking about visitors who come through. You’re a modern day scribe, throughout the Bible prophets and apostles had somebody along side of them to write down what God would say. In the age of technology you can just press a button, but the anointing of the prophetic is coming on you tonight. You’re going to begin to anticipate the Lord is about to hit the drums, the Lord is about to hit the guitar, the Lord is about to hit the trumpet. I’m telling you, you’re going to facilitate, anticipate, and help set the atmosphere for the move of the spirit of God. Because to you being a sound tech is not just being a sound tech or something that you do, but its your act of worship. Where you have your hands right now is your instrument. And I’m telling you for all the times for all the places and here that we didn’t say thank you, thank you. For all the times musicians gave you a hard time, thank you. And for all the times that you labored from the before the begging until the end, thank you. There’s a mantle of son-ship that is falling upon you. Because you’re not a servant in the house, you’re a son in the house. Son’s have rights that servants don’t have. And I see the spirit of adoption coming upon you. And I’m saying this because I know you won’t stop or won’t quit, but if you never ran sound at another service, we’d still love you, and if you weren’t there to get it just right, we’d still love you, and the stamp of approval from daddy God is coming upon you, sir. But here’s the thing, you like to hide behind that. Its comfortable and it’s a safe place for you. But the Lord is not ashamed of you, and we are not ashamed from you, and we call you from the shadows to the forefront. And I declare as you have recorded messages of other people, prophecies of other people, the Lord is about to have other people record your message, record your prophecies, for there are people that you will win that nobody else could win. And don’t cover up the tattoos, don’t hide the tattoos because it will serve as a testimony that God is not concerned with the outward appearance but he looks at what is in the heart. You’re going to affect people in counter cultures, Harley riders, drug addicts. Its like they come up to you at McDonald’s and the say to you “What is that, when did you get that? What does that mean?” and there’s going to be a testimony behind every one of your tats. And you watch as the Lord uses you as a mighty prophetic evangelist in the days to come. You may not write a book about it, you may not come up with a great tape series about it. But you’ll live it, and there is an anointing that is coming upon you, and tonight I believe the Lord is wanting me to release to you a father’s blessing, which you have longed for all your life. You don’t just have the approval man, but you have the approval of your heavenly father. You’re not even done yet but I hear the Lord saying “Well done good and faithful servant.” “I’m proud of you, son” “I believe in you son, you measure up son” The hand of the Lord is coming upon you right now. I see you standing alone on a ball field looking at the crowd saying are they here, are they here? And I see the Lord standing up, giving you a standing ovation, because he’s proud of you.

I don’t know how you can but if you can come down here a minute I believe there’s something the lord wants to impart to you here.

Rick: I want to tag team on this before David prays because this is a prophetic sign, because the world tried to hijack Tommy’s gift and calling and he’s come back home. And he’s come back home to his house, his parents, his calling. He didn’t know all he was coming home to but he knew he had to come home. And I want everyone in here to understand why this is so significant, because when the prodigals return, it’s the first sign of the revival.

David: I believe its significant too for even your dad here to pray his blessing over you, you see you had his Love and his blessing all along but you thought it was dependant on performance, but the amazing thing about being a son doesn’t matter what you do or where you go, your still a son. This is a prophetic sign because just like when Paul Revere road through New England yelling, “The British are coming, The British are coming”, I heard the sound of many horseman and I heard the spirit of the Lord yelling “The prodigals are coming, the prodigals are coming, get the robes and the rings ready, the prodigals are coming.” And many of you here tonight you’ve got prodigal sons and daughters, brothers, sisters, mothers and fathers. And the prodigals are coming. And I believe that there is a power in blessing. There’s a power in the fathers blessing.

Dad: God I thank you for Tommy, I thank you for the many years you’ve been with him and strengthen him with your spirit, filled him with hopes, dreams, desires of yours. And I thank you for bringing this family together Lord Sandy and I, Susie and Tommy. I thank you for this church and this home, and your spirit and the work you’re doing here and in greater new England. I just pray your blessing on my son, your son Lord. That he would be a great part in it and that you would give in him a strong spirit to sustain him in the days to come with what your doing here in new England and in this church and in this body. I thank you Lord.

David: And I release to you the blessings of daddy god and I declare that you’ll go further and farther than you ever expected and that you don’t just represent the prodigals that are coming home but you represent the legacy in the house of God, he’s the God of Abraham Isaac and Jacob. What one generation could not do, the second generation picked up, when they couldn’t do it the nest generation took over. And I just declare that you’ll go further, you’ll go faster, you’ll go farther. I don’t know the full impact of it but what I see is a sound revolution to come. And really what I see is that you’re going to instrumental in the transformation of some hard rocker types, some punk types, some unusual people, you’re going to begin to facilitate and work even the sound that will release an anointing in the atmosphere to will draw a generation. I heard the Lord say, write you’re testimony out, it doesn’t have to be a big long couple hundred page novel but write a deal out, it will speak volumes into the lives of many people. And Tommy I bless you today. I believe although we’ll still call you Tommy, I believe the Lord has a new name for you, its Peter, because you’re going to be a rock of revelation. A rock of revelation, Peter didn’t always get it write, but he always came back. Peter didn’t always say it right, but you always saw his passion in his heart. You are like a peter, a rock, a rock of revelation. In Jesus name Amen.

Feel free to call me Peter from now on...